Who keeps pissing on my head?

Seriously. December first has come and gone and Toronto still has no snow. Not for lack of precipitation, Oh no. Last night it was pouring rain on my bike ride home. My glasses were streaked with rain, I couldn't see and even my underwear was soaking wet by the time I got home. This is not a good start to my dream winter wonderland holiday season.

Beverly hill giggles

The Hills to the greatest show. Don't believe me? read for your self:

"Heavenly father, thank for for this meal, thank you for my husband and thank you for my outfit" - Heidi

"I don't wear seatbelts. I want to be thrown from the wreckage" - Charlie

"I can't believe they don't have a male birth control pill yet. I should have been on it" - Spencer

"I just wanna be depressed here, I don't wanna get pumped up" - Also Spencer

Blood, guts, bruises, cuts.

This is not your favorite summer party album ever. It's our outdoor staircase. As Kiera was leaving the house she yelled for me to come outside. What is this? she said as she pointed to something disgusting dripping off our staircase. Apparently last night a raccoon picked up the dead squirrel on our neighbors lawn and chewed it's guts out on the porch. There is now dead squirrel blood and guts hanging on the stairs between me and my bike. EWWW!!

Weekend Foreshadowing:

It's like, impossible for me to not get drunk
- Shanuy Poonany

It's gonna be a gooder.

Butt What.

So the other day at the gym, there was a bunch of hot bitches and my competitive edge over took me and I started to secretly gym battle them. They didn't know, but I did like, a million more lunges then they did. So they can take there skinny asses home and think about that. I however took my extremely sore, over lunged buns to West Scarborough the next day. I had to meet up for a school project and have no funds for transit so I just biked there. No big deal, I biked to Etobikoe one Saturday and Scarborough is even closer. But not close. It's still a fair ways away. Here is a map of my 1h20 min round trip.



View Larger Map

My leg muscles are having a hard time keeping me upright today. Tomorrow - stair sets at Casa Loma. But that's for an other post.

Microsurfers unite

Windows 7 is coming out tomorrow. How thrilling. If I used a PC.

At Thanksgiving the Pops and I had a great conversation about Mac vs PC. He uses both for work and I was a PC geek up until a couple of years ago so it was a very even weighted and slightly nostalgic discussion. I now have the worlds most resilient mac book (3 years running and still kicking despite being stolen, spilled on, drunk on vodka, missing screws, 1 crashed hard drive and being prone to jumping of 10 ft high loft beds) and love it to bits, even if the staff at the Mac store don't love it as much as I do (continue reading for details). I do however wish I could get as stoked on Windows 7 as I would have in my pre-Mac youth. With Apples constant release of large felines meowing to be installed on my MacBook, I have become rather desensitized to the Apple home page. Sweet! version 10.4.5.89 os X Ocelot! iPod touch 2nd generation just had a grand kid! While Mac is constantly putting out new products and upgrades I'm pretty sure Windows spent all the time inbetween Vista and 7 devoted to customer service and actually telling poor little university students why their hard drive crashed 1 day before their major reserach project and how they can get those missing scews back into thier largest piece of net worth. Good luck Bill with operation 7. May the debate continue.

Geek out

Ever since I was 8 years old I have loved computers. I was however conscious that people who geeked out on computers all day were generally slapped with a big old "Hi my name is Loser" tag in junior high. Because of my need to be socially accepted, I kept my inner geek hidden behind competitive sports, punk rock and mis behaving. 10 years since junior high and I am wondering if being accepted actually ruined my life. I back on the geek out, hard core. If I had been hardcore all the time, i would be able to write posts like this - "Posted at 2:03pm"

and be sucessful like this - ConnectedVentures

Instead I sit in my sweatpants googling and waiting for my shit ass, yet to be upgraded internet to fully deliver me the latest episode of The City.

Me and my Good self

So strolling down the street today on my way to look at Bodums, I walked past a CIBC atm. No big deal, happens everyday. But everyday is not today! Today in the atm, was 400$ that someone forgot to pick up. 400$! Perfect! I could buy every bodum in the Green Beanery! I heard however, someone talking to me. It was my good self. The part of me that's makes me do things I don't want do, to work harder than I should and makes me tired all the time but also helps me buy nutritious food and graduate university. As I was locking up my bike to take the money into the bank, a frantic looking middle aged man raced past me and blundered into the bank. He came out side with a security guard as I approached the bank. Yes it was his money and man was he grateful. I saved the day for him and the poor security guard. He gave me a massive hug and now I have karma up the ying yang. But no bodum. Come on karma, buy me a bodum in thanks.

An 8:30 rush

I moaned and groaned to myself all the way out of the house this morning. It's too early, I'm too tired, it's too beautiful  a morning to be going for a run. I ALWAYS feel better after a run, so should always go, even if I don't want to.This morning however, i discoverd an extra reason to get my butt out of bed, especially at 8:30 am. Grade School. There is 3-4 different elementary schools in the surrounding neighbor hoods and I got to see all the little children on their way to school. I have baby fever (but whats new?) and I have it bad. The siblings holding hands with thier parents behind them, the grandparents walking the kid with bouncy balls for shoes, the young girl and her dad bike riding the 2 blocks to school, and the preschooler so bundled up all they can do is rotate and waddle. I want them all! I want to teach them crafts and sing the alaphabet and pack thier bagged lunches. Parents of the annex, i'm coming for your children. In 5-7 years of course. .  .   .

In my bed this evening.....

For those of you who haven't heard, there's a new man in my life. He's affectionate, cuddly, vocal and almost always hungry. I was in Calgary for thanksgiving and I think he took it kind of hard, which is expected from someone of such raw emotion. I guess that's why he just hopped into my bed to surprise me tonight. Liam, the classic cat romantic. Who knew that his insensate meowing and diligent grooming were all for me and the pile of blankets and clothes that is my bed? If only his owners knew.

Chili Fire

So my job this year is at a Japanese Ramen House. I like it a lot and feel like my life is similar to Brittney Murphy in "The Ramen Girl" even though I have yet to see it (Thanksgiving weekend, it's a date). I make noodles and cut shrimp and stir fry like mad. Yesterday how ever, I apparently decided to stirfry extra mad. You know how when you're flipping the pan to mix the veggies (like so), well yesterday it turned a little more into a flaming ball of fire in the pan instead of veggies. Me, in my cool collect way, let out a little "WOW!" then tactfully brought the pan up to blow out the flames. All was well afterwords, except for my eyelashes and eyebrows. I burnt them. My eyelashes have split ends. My life as I know it is over. I'll be crawled up in a hole in the floor if you need me.

Cat Creepage

1. Found my wallet, don't worry. Thank you to Facebook and the Ryerson Student Union using it to creep me and send me a message.

2. Liam the cat.

So there is this cat that likes to hang out at our house. Sometimes it gets some tuna from the kind hearted Laur Laur Vag and we all used to pet it until it starting hanging around all the time an meowing till it was fed then peaced out. Let me tell you, we are not a house of ladies to be used and abused. We like our cuddle time ok, this is no in and out, 7 secs in heaven type of deal. Liam has been persistent however. On many occasions he has been heard and seen meowing at the kitchen window, even daring to jump in sometimes. This morning Liam took a leap. Not only did Liam jump in the open kitchen window, but decided to creep all the way upstairs and through any open door. Unfortunately, my room was the only open door and thus I was awaking to the insistent meows and creepage by my bed side of a hungry Liam. In my room. at 7:30 am. GOD DAMMIT LIAM!!

Please note Liam is not a stray. He has owners and is well groomed. He just likes to eat.

Should I be writing this from my own computer I would have attached a photo of the bold Liam but since my hard drive crashed and I don't have a computer for two weeks and am writing this from my roommates, K Hess, no photo.

Red Alert: lost wallet

This is a message for all those googlers out there. In particular, the one who potentially found my wallet and googled my name and was brought to this blog post about how I lost my wallet today on the Ryerson campus. If you, my new and favorite reader, have indeed found it please email me at k.mudry@hotmail.com. While there is some great stuff in there, like my alberta health card and all primary ids, I doubt anyone but me would really like a picture from christmas 1995 of Molly, Jake and Daisy, cute as they are.

yep, k.mudry@hotmail.com. just hit me with and email, your welcome to the 5 cents of change in there. Thanks to you, and google and the internet for hopefully returning my wallet to me.

Stuck in the middle with poo.

So I got my hair dyed yesterday and it is like, totally heinous. I was all, back to my root color please! What did I end up with? Fucking laguna beach barbie train wreck that's what. I am somewhere between dirty blonde and light brown and far far away from myself. Seriously, my eyebrows are REALLY dark. So were my roots. that is my natural color. It wasn't just the blonde playing tricks with your eyes. I have hair the color of night. Minus one or two shades. We are getting dye from the salon tomorrow to redo it at home. Like Hell I am going back to the salon! This is why I box dye. (Some punch the pouty mouthed bitch in that picture. GOD. Who does she think she is? Queen of Highlights?)

Third Times a Charm.

Hopefully this will be my last post of the day, because if it's not I will have to chain myself to the opposite end of the room as my laptop.

While 3 posts in one day may seem like a little too much, I feel this one is most important as it is actually not my third, but forth post of the day. Where is the real third post you ask? On my real sweet new food blog - Oh My Vegan Life.

Brief synopsis of OMVL - I explore the world of veganism, cook meat for 60+ children, fry bacon on the daily for my boyfriend and do it all on the brokest of broke budgets. This means that I will be posting most of my food adventures and cravings and recipes on this new blog and streamlining "So I Said..." (or simply kmudry.blogspot.com) into a new and improved place where I write hilarious thoughts and grievances about people and whales and Zealand (please see May 16th 2009) but not about food.

All for blogging and blogging for food!

Who is laughing? iI'll sock it to them.

Is MTV making a some kind of new sitcom about my life? No? Well then who keeps making all these awful jokes happen to me?

For example: the watch that I can't find but can hear beep everyday at 6:30 am.
Or the constant rain on my two week vacation.
Or the piece of random food caught between my teeth that WILL NOT come out.

Here is the kicker - I FINALLY find my phone charger after a month and a half of disconnect. Now I can't find my phone.

Dear MTVagface: I am rating this parody of my life as subpar. Like so subpar you wouldn't even make it to the auditions line up for So you Think You Can Dance. You'd be stopped before you left your house in your undersized spandex and oversized jazz shoes and be replaced by Big Bird. Now give me back my phone.

A Posh Post

So my 72 minutes of megavideo ran up half way through the first season of "The Next Iron Chef" so I had to find some other amazing show to watch while scanning slides of my grandma from the 60's. I don't know how it happened, why I haven't seen this before, and why this isn't the number one show on tv, but I feel my life is far more complete now thanks to Victoria Beckham: Coming to America. The Beckhams are how I dream of married life.



She knew she was my favorite Spice for a reason.

A Dark and Stormy Return.

Dear blogosphere,

I am back. Yes I know - HALLELUIA! If only for a brief two week stint before I return to the wilderness and throngs of pubescent boys and girls (summer camp). In the following days I will give you months worth of blogging and you might become overwhelmed, so this is your official warning - too hilarity might ensue. or not. but probably.

While there is many a blog to be written on running, puberty, the Juile/Julia Project and my latest endeavor called "Oh my Vegan Life" this evenings entry will be a simple conversation starter from me to you - So how bout hurricane Calgary? Am I right?

Last night with the window open the winds were so strong we (the BF and I) had to put a dresser in front of the door to keep it from blowing open. It is storming again tonight and I am very afraid that the electricity will go out and my Herb and Parmesean bread that is in the oven will be destroyed. Not that I didn't already destroy it by using shitty instant yeast, but that's for an other post.

Like Bacon in a fry pan.

WHY DO I SMELL LIKE GARLIC?? Yesterday, understandable, ate a lot of it. Today, come on. There are no vampires in the vicinity so I do not understand why I smell like a vampire hunter. And no, all you people snarking at this, it is not because I am dirty. I showered. Yesterday. or the day before. One of them. For Realz.

I am about to pack up my bag and get ready to come home from my brief stint as a world traveler. Before that, a list.

Things I miss:
Laur Laur Vag's LolzCatz book.
Laur laur Vag and all my T.O bitches (bitches in this case is gender neutral).
The Gluten Free Vegan pizza I ate last night.
Having income cash flow (for more pizza. duh.)
That guy I hangout with in Calgary. He has a dirty mustache and skinny knees. You know, that one.

I am excited to come home to warm weather and sun after 6 pm. NZ you are nice, but summer is calling my pale legs back to canada. I think I will wear naught but my underwear for my first week back so as to become a bronzen beauty. Ya'll know how good I tan. Like bacon on a fry pan.

Live from New Zealand:

Today is my last full day in NZ, before my FULL day of travel. For reals, wake up bus plane death. Anyways, here is the #1 thing I have learned while in the southern hemisphere - electric blankets are the bee's knees. I you love somebody, buy them an electric blanket. It is the only way to be.

I am now off to cook copious amounts of rice, walk a very long distance, and see a free museum. Such is my traveling ways.

Rubixed

My foot smells so bad. Bodily odors aside, went to this kick ass party last night. You know those parties you see in american movies and your like, are you f-ing kidding me? Well, that actually happens. In Australia. Hugh Jackman wasn't there, but it was still fucking off the wall.

Description: Rubixs Cube Party. Everyone wears crazy colors, then trades them.
Highlight: Dancing to the live band with no pants on.

Also, I taught people how to pee in the bushes, was saved by a heroic Australian from the mosh pit and drank lots of goon. Not as much as at the beach, I drank 4 litres the other day (all in one epic day), and this morning Ms. Kate Sheills vommed instead of me. I vommed 5 times yesterday though so, everything is even i suppose. HAZAA!! Tomorrow I go to New Zealand.

Question: Where is Zealand?

Till lunch:

So yeah, i'm in austraila, it is great and will write more on that later but for now:

As I am lounging, waiting for lunch at my friends Uni I found this:

This looks like a fabulous movie. I am cooking all summer and thus want to become amazing at it. I probably won't though, as I've never cooked meat before and haven't even really touched it in 5 years soooo, guess i'll just live vicariously through Julie&Julia

Anyways, got some delicious gluten free vegan cookies at the safeway today, have been watching Underbelly everynight, an amazing show about real live Melbourne gangsters, and am excited to go on a solo journey through the trying meaderings of Melbrounes transit system.

Expoopia.ca

So this is the fifth time I have called expedia.ca to try and change my flights for my wee trip to Aus/NZ. Seems my phone likes to drop my calls, or they like to transfer me for 10 mins or the flights are 200$ cheaper the day before. This is the worst. Also, my travel agent was too slow and the last flight out of NZ on the day I wanted was just "scooped up" before she could finalize it. "Bear with me please, give me one moment please". Go Drop Dead expedia.ca

Por Favor

Watchin the Hills season 4 online in between studying. Have also been listening to a lot of T.I and rapping with my guitar. This is my life these days, plus packing and doing the endless line of dishes that some how always appears.

In my current ep of the Hills, Heidi and Spencer went to mexico and were sipin on Patron hard as. "you know what patrone does to me!" oh Heidi, you dumb bitch. Then Spencer asked for the top shelf tequila, even higher then Patron. Seeing as I instantly threw up after my last shot of tequila i'm not up on the scene and don't know if there is something more expensive then Patron. If there is, somebody better let T.I and his bros know. Drop a couple stacks on it.

Broke Cooking

So recently I've been really into reading Vegan Cooking Blogs. In my favorites bar is Your Vegan Mom- a blog a bout vegan food and 2 year olds, two of my favorite things. She has links to a millions different VeganBlogs like The Post Punk Kitchen, What The Hell (does/a/vegan/eat/anyways), and Chow Vegan.

I love drooling over all the recipes and reading about the crazy ingredients and almost start cooking all those delicious meals but then I open my fridge and realize that I have naught but Ketchup and Mustard. Don't' worry, there is some rice in the cupboard and some flax seed kicking around but definitely not "1 cube of vegan vegetable bouillon"
"1/2 teaspoon dried marjoram" or "2-3 pieces whole star anise".

The Facts: I'm a gluten/potato/corn free Vegan. I have minimal funds. We have, at most, ever, two clean cooking utensils.

The Conclusion: Broke Cooking - in which me and my roommates make edible food on our broke ass budget with our broke down kitchen and it's all something my sorry ass insides can digest.

stay tuned. (We do get lazy though, so don't hold your breath)

Blonde and Bitchin.

This is my fav: Christina Aguilera - Keeps getting better

Also, Metric has a new album coming out. This acoustic track is beautiful.

Lastly, sleep is for the lame. I live off brown rice, bean soup and Freshmint gum. That's it.

Update on the nose ring: Opted to go sans ball. The ring twisted out of my nose, but not enough to fall off. Realized tonight, twisted it back in basically re-piercing my nose. Now my face hurts. No biggie.

Well OK!

So, I am just eating some delicious homemade black bean chipotle soup (a little to much curry powder but still delicious) and watchin some Project Runway Season 4 online. And drinking some wine. Wait, need a refill.....

... So yeah, a cute old asian man just took my passport photo, told me I was beautiful and I handed a big print shit balls project in this morning and now i'm just chillin wit me myself and I. How could this get better you ask? Well BINGO BANGO ladies and gentleman (mainly ladies, I doubt any boys will care) Brooke Shields appears on the ep of Project Runway, and the challenge is to designing an outfit for her character on Lipstick jungle! Yafuckinhoo.

Speaking of Lipstick Jungle and Candace Bushnell, I had a 15 min conversation with a regular at the coffee shop last night and part of it was an introspective look at Sex and the City and how amazing being a strong independent women is. So, ok, we all know that SATC is way better then LJ but Lindsay Price who plays Victory Ford in LJ is one of the most beautiful women i've ever seen. Plus, Nico's jewelry makes me short of breath it's so beautiful.

Well, enough of this, Project runway awaits (stupid streaming video).

This fuckin shit!

So went with my girl Tatiana who was in town for a delicious sushi lunch and the fun times of downtown toronto (it was beautiful out today, don't trust me?). Then, duh, we had to get her nose pierced so, did that, and I got a smaller ring for my nose. No probs, I'll put it in my self, no need to pay someone 10$ to fiddle with my nose. This is what I look like now:



Balls. The ball is too small for my fat fingers and everything is just shitty. Jojo, call me. Help me. I'm lost in a see of piercings.

p.s being at the piercing place made me really want more. and tattoos. more more more.

Breakfast of Champions

So last night I went to bed before 2 am, which is when I usually give into sleep and turn of what ever tv show I am watching on my computer. Because I went to bed so early, I woke up early. At like, 8:00. I don't have class till 10. What the hell am I supposed to do with all this time? Make my self a banana soy milkshake of course! Walk to the asain supermarket. Closed. Every other store on spadina - closed. How come no one can keep up with my productive lifestyle? So here I sit, waiting for class, and eating my new daily delicacy - quin0a, lentils, and Italian salad dressing. Vegans rule.

edit - spiced the above up today with some flax seeds. yummers.

Chomp on this.

Dinner: One Guava drink from the Asian super market. A piece of bread with shit ass hummus that I made. The chickpeas weren't cooked enough. My roomates say it's good but I guess I just have high standards. It's in the fridge if anyone wants it.

Dessert: A banana sprinkled with flax seeds. Then some spoonfulls of flax seeds. Ok, what, I am like a little bird. A Sparrow if you will. Ima mate for life. Or a whale, they mate for life as well. but don't eat flax. Shit, sparrow it is. PLUS - flax is super high in omega 3 and dietary fiber. Also, it can be used as an effective egg subsitute in vegan cooking. Ima tap that.

GEAH!

It's a woman's world. Baby.

You know what gives me a boner? - http://www.blogotheque.net/Tom-Jones,4683

I'm off to pluck my eyebrows and shave my legs. Then watch a Heath ledger movie, drink wine and probably cry with my girlfriends. Jokes. Ima get wasted. The aforementioned was last night.

Chomp - КУСАТЬ

Ya ischu devushku, kotoraya khochet lyubit i bit luybimoy. - I am looking for a girl who wants to love and be loved.

One time I really wanted to learn Russian. I tried to teach myself with the interent but, turns out it's pretty hard. Like, honestly, that above phrase looks like this in real russian - Я ищу девушку, которая хочет любить и быть любимой.

There is no way that is going to happen until I finish the last two seasons of Trailer Park boys. Look how seductive these guys are -



Also, I have been craving HotDogs real bad lately. Well, veggie dogs duh, but I still can't have those cause they are full of gluten. But just imagine if they weren't -


To soothe the pain in my heart that is not being able to eat hotdogs or veggie dogs I listen to this song - Usher Love in this Club (MSTRKRFT remix)

p.s TPB words of wisdom for the day - One mans garbage is another mans perfectly good ungarbage.

On attractiveness.

Peeve: When you are trying to put toothpaste on your toothbrush but it just falls right off into the sink. Not only did you waste toothpaste but those blobs are tricky to wash down the drain.

Today a girl came into my work and told me that I looked like Elisha Cuthbert. I can see how she thought that:




Twins.

That said, I haven't showered in 2 weeks.

Chemistry - heat and bleach.

In response to this post, here is a link to the wonderful wikipedia article about Toast and a Calvin and Hobbes comic for you:

Last night was an unofficial girls night. We talked of boys, ate salsa, didn't do homework and died my hair again. In addition to the new dye and final actual bleach blondeness of my hair I have started wearing it differently. How different you ask? It's crazy. Don't believe me? Check the pic below.


Ya, you got it, started parting it on the OPPOSITE SIDE! I am livin life for the moment. You know. In addition to a bleached scalp I have a new zit on the left side of my face. Look close and you might see it. Perfect.

A good link.

HI-larious joke for you - my nose is running hard then Obabma did for office.

a K mudry original. thank you.

also, this blog is amazing and from the greatest girl - miss MOlly Swain ladies and gentlemen!! She is in NZ. I am jealous. My blog is pale in comparision to hers. Seriously, she is getting tanned, I am getting snowed on. I am very, very pale and she is very, very NZ.

To Do list:

Get Married


Have Kids


Thats about it right now. Too much? Not enough? I should probably add something practical to this list.....

Blow my nose
Clean the Sink
Finish season 2 of Curb your enthusiasm.

Ok. Big day. Watch for a Save the Date.

5 truthful things about yours truly.

1. I rarely eat eggs because they are chicken menstruation and that is gross.
2. I love egg salad sandwiches. Especially without the gluten and thus just the salad bit.
3. I shower only 2 times per week
4. My average Weight Watchers count is 7 points
5. Ruffles Sour Cream and Onion chips remind me of junior high.

I have been wanting to write a highly academic blog about toast but have yet to get arond to it. I also want to blog about: HumpbackwhalesTorontomusicKarenoNailpolishFreecheese.

Get excited for that shit.

Blog Time

Ok, so, my fans are harping on me and I caved to the pressure. Here it is, a new blog. Doesn't mean it's good or sober or entertaining but now you can STFU (translated, please be quite for a while. My audience is PG.)

I've been reading Microserfs by Douglas Coupland recently (thanks Maggie!). Also, drank 3/4 of a 40 tonight with my girls Mcballs and MK (Maggie Koabel. Far better then MK Olsen, in case you're wondering) and so with the combination of the two, I present a list, or collection, ensemble, potpourri, group, blah blah blahblahblah of my thoughts.

Vodka. YES! Should have done it. Condoms. Work Hard. Oh Balls. MONEY MONEY MONEY. Donald Trump (money). I want to be a millionaire. You Know. I got your (insert NZ accent) Message. Gingivitis. Pap test. Oops. Ow. Good times. Good thing. Maybe later, maybe never. Not never, for real. Real life. Ocean. Ocean Ocean Ocean Tomatoes. Sappy. Mad Love. This is happening. Weekend of, for real. I'll pay. I Love you. Don't worry about it. Seriously, just don't worry about it, it'll all be good. The most. Kick, push Kick push (x2.5) coast. COAST.


Eat a Dick.