Is MTV making a some kind of new sitcom about my life? No? Well then who keeps making all these awful jokes happen to me?
For example: the watch that I can't find but can hear beep everyday at 6:30 am.
Or the constant rain on my two week vacation.
Or the piece of random food caught between my teeth that WILL NOT come out.
Here is the kicker - I FINALLY find my phone charger after a month and a half of disconnect. Now I can't find my phone.
Dear MTVagface: I am rating this parody of my life as subpar. Like so subpar you wouldn't even make it to the auditions line up for So you Think You Can Dance. You'd be stopped before you left your house in your undersized spandex and oversized jazz shoes and be replaced by Big Bird. Now give me back my phone.
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